Trail# 1315 (March 23, 2008)

Trail:1315Reluctant Cottager's Virgin Lay
Hares:2Reluctant Cottager, The Body
Start:2:35pmUnder the bridge at Loop 360 and Lakewood Drive
Beer Check:#1Low water crossing gate at Old Spicewood Springs and Loop 360
End:4:50pm8714 Bluegrass Drive
Miles:4.7
Temp in Circle:63°F
Pack:34
FRB:Smut Mutt
DFL:Menage A Paw
Visitors:3Erection Priceless [San Antonio H3], Just Sean (w/Butthole) [Florida], Pecker Nipples [New Orleans H3]
New Boots:2Just Adam (w/Chick), Just Kate (w/Chick)
Six Week Wankers:6Bubbles The Sad Beer Clown [6wks], Easy Access [12wks], El Smeets [14wks], Minnesota Butthole [88wks], No Dick Doc [51wks], Wh-Oreo [6wks]
Auto Wankers:4Father Syphilis, Plug My Hole, Baby!, Squeef
DNF:0
Awards:1Reluctant Cottager (1st Lay)
Namings:1Just Roland=Gluteus Intrudeus
Transplants:1Donkey's McAss (Phoenix H3)
Noteworthy Down Downs:#1Father Syphilis, for earning his 200th beer plaque at Flying Saucer
Maps:Trail Map     Trail Elevation     

AH3 Statistics (current Junta year)

Trails19
Longest Trail9.0 miles[Dec 16th] Hared by High Beams, Wicked Itch of the Yeast, SoCo Ho
8.5 miles[Jan 6th] Hared by SmegmaBalls, Just Katharina (BRC)
7.3 miles[Feb 24th] Hared by Extra Sausage, Please, Day Old Fish
Shortest Trail3.5 miles[Nov 25th] Hared by Death By Dildo, D'Dildo, Tuck It Up The Butt
3.6 miles[Feb 3rd] Hared by Head Banger, Pumper Up The Butt, Mo Job
3.7 miles[Dec 30th] Hared by Father Syphilis, Just Michael (BRC), Takes A Bigger Cock
Largest Pack63[Feb 10th] Hared by She Mussel Bitch, Dick the Boy Wonder
53[Feb 17th] Hared by High Beams, Little Ring Riding Hood, Bone Sucker, Just Mike (w/LRRH), Sticky Fingers
52[Dec 30th] Hared by Father Syphilis, Just Michael (BRC), Takes A Bigger Cock
Smallest Pack21[Nov 25th] Hared by Death By Dildo, D'Dildo, Tuck It Up The Butt
25[Mar 9th] Hared by Dead Whore Dave, Dude, Where's My Beercheck?
25[Feb 24th] Hared by Extra Sausage, Please, Day Old Fish
28[Dec 23rd] Hared by Vagitarian, Little Ring Riding Hood, Day Old Fish, Just Shawn (w/Vag)
Most Auto Wankers6 (15%)[Dec 9th] Hared by Strap-on Elvis, C'em Cummin
5 (17%)[Dec 16th] Hared by High Beams, Wicked Itch of the Yeast, SoCo Ho
4 (12%)[Mar 23rd] Hared by Reluctant Cottager, The Body
4 (16%)[Mar 9th] Hared by Dead Whore Dave, Dude, Where's My Beercheck?
4 (10%)[Mar 2nd] Hared by C'em Cummin, Day Old Fish, Try A Fuck (TAF), The Body
4 (8%)[Feb 17th] Hared by High Beams, Little Ring Riding Hood, Bone Sucker, Just Mike (w/LRRH), Sticky Fingers
Most Frequent FRBFather Syphilis71297,1298,1302,1304,1308,1313,1314
Smut Mutt41305,1311,1312,1315
Warmest Circle79°F[Dec 2nd] Hared by Try A Fuck (TAF), Father Syphilis
78°F[Feb 3rd] Hared by Head Banger, Pumper Up The Butt, Mo Job
77°F[Feb 24th] Hared by Extra Sausage, Please, Day Old Fish
77°F[Mar 2nd] Hared by C'em Cummin, Day Old Fish, Try A Fuck (TAF), The Body
Coldest Circle43°F[Nov 25th] Hared by Death By Dildo, D'Dildo, Tuck It Up The Butt
51°F[Dec 16th] Hared by High Beams, Wicked Itch of the Yeast, SoCo Ho
53°F[Jan 20th] Hared by She Mussel Bitch, Father Syphilis
Average Trail5.5 milesThe trails will be in the range 4.0-7.0 miles 68% of the time.
Average Pack37The packs will be in the range 26-48 on 68% of the trails.
Average Attendance21%
Average Trail (2007)5.0 milesThe trails were in the range 3.0-7.0 miles 68% of the time.
Average Pack (2007)31The packs were in the range 23-39 on 68% of the trails.
Average Trail (2006)5.2 milesThe trails were in the range 3.5-6.3 miles 68% of the time.
Average Pack (2006)37The packs were in the range 27-47 on 68% of the trails.
Average Trail (2005)5.5 milesThe trails were in the range 3.7-7.3 miles 68% of the time.
Average Pack (2005)40The packs were in the range 27-53 on 68% of the trails.
Active Hashers14759% Harriers, 41% Harriettes
Inactive Hashers608
Six-Week Wankers42Average Weeks Wanking= 13
NFHN31
Visitors41
New Boots63And 35 were frightened away by the experience!
Location of Active Austin Hashers
Bubbaland   Central     North       Northwest   East        West        Lake Travis No Zipcode  Not Austin 
6 0 24 15 13 1 3 65 20
100% AttendanceThe Body100%
Hashing is my life!Father Syphilis95%
High Beams95%
Smut Mutt95%
Wicked Itch of the Yeast89%
Wanksgiving84%
50-75% AttendanceCreamadonna74%
Client #6968%
SoCo Ho63%
She Mussel Bitch63%
Try A Fuck (TAF)63%
All Shaft No Head63%
Gluteus Intrudeus63%
Bubbles The Sad Beer Clown58%
Wh-Oreo58%
UniPorn58%
Scatman Poo58%
Reluctant Cottager58%
Squeeze Box53%
Frequent Autowankers (% of Trails)Plug My Hole, Baby!100%
Squeef 80%
Just Head 67%
Cherry Popper 60%
Just Michelle (w/Just Roland) 50%
Puerto Rican Jew 50%
Heavin' Semen 50%
Missed Her Bush 50%
Most Profilic Hares (# of trails hared)
Father Syphilis31299,1303,1306
Day Old Fish31302,1311,1312
C'em Cummin31300,1307,1312
Experienced Hashers that have NOT hared this Junta year
47(Massive) Slut Slinger, A Bill Named Sue, All Shaft No Head, Beaver Cleaver, Big Bloody Ketchup, Blow Hole, Brrrr, Cadaver Diver, Cherry Popper, Creamadonna, Crusty Beaver, Cumonawanalaya, Daffadildo, Do Monkey, Easy Access, El Smeets, Free Meat, Fuck U Knave, Great Dane Pain, Heavin' Semen, I Pee Freely, I Swallow Wood, Just Head, Meat Between The Teeth, Menage A Paw, Missed Her Bush, Mr. Pib, My Ingrown Testicle, No Dick Doc, Organ Grinder, Pornarotti, Porno Pixie, Prozac, RainBlow Not-So-Bright, Rocky Twat, Smells Like Teen Fanny, Smut Mutt, Sperm Bank, Squeef, Squeezin' Semen, Stay Free With Wings, Swalamander, Twin Peaks, Twinkie Up The Butt, Two Drinks Away From My Sister, Unzip Me, blASSt Zone
The TOP 10 Hares (# of trails hared) since November 16, 2003
The Body22
Day Old Fish21
Father Syphilis20
She Mussel Bitch19
High Beams18
Try A Fuck (TAF)17
Death By Dildo15
Brownie13
C'em Cummin13
Tuck It Up The Butt13
@ss Gagger11
Strap-on Elvis11
All Shaft No Head10
Wicked Itch of the Yeast10
A trip down memory lane - Experienced Hashers that haven't been seen on trail for a LONG time
25babyG, Bad Andi, Ballsac Fondler, Diaper Dan, Glow Worm, Happy Crack, Home Alone, Instant Replay, Itchy Hole, Jug Tugger, Lewis and Cock, Limestone cOW!boy, Lost N Mound, Love Bite, Medusa, Pee Pee Longstocking, Pop-A-Cock, Pork Pushing Pimp, Princess LeiMe, Ram Rod, Speedie Edie, Sphincter Blinker, Tits R 4 Tricks, Tornanalsoreass Rex, Whoops Wrong Hole
Most enthusiastic New Boots (% attendance since first trail)
Gluteus Intrudeus57%
SoCo Ho52%
Mind Your Bitch50%
Awards Earned (Active Hashers Only)
666-999 Trails2Crusty Beaver, She Mussel Bitch
500-665 Trails1Sperm Bank
250-499 Trails17Big Bloody Ketchup, Blow Hole, Cadaver Diver, Cherry Popper, Father Syphilis, High Beams, Meat Between The Teeth, Mr. Pib, My Ingrown Testicle, Organ Grinder, Pumper Up The Butt, SmegmaBalls, Smut Mutt, The Body, Try A Fuck (TAF), Twin Peaks, Twinkie Up The Butt
100-249 Trails25(Massive) Slut Slinger, A Bill Named Sue, All Shaft No Head, Bubbles The Sad Beer Clown, C'em Cummin, Creamadonna, Crotch Rot, Day Old Fish, Death By Dildo, Easy Access, El Smeets, Free Meat, Great Dane Pain, I Pee Freely, Just Head, Squeef, Squeezin' Semen, Stay Free With Wings, Strap-on Elvis, Swalamander, Tuck It Up The Butt, Unzip Me, Wanksgiving, Wh-Oreo, Wicked Itch of the Yeast
69-99 Trails1Fuck U Knave
25-68 Trails26@ss Gagger, Beaver Cleaver, blASSt Zone, Bone Sucker, Brrrr, Cumonawanalaya, Daffadildo, Dead Whore Dave, Do Monkey, Dude, Where's My Beercheck?, Head Banger, Heavin' Semen, I Swallow Wood, Little Ring Riding Hood, Menage A Paw, Missed Her Bush, No Dick Doc, Pornarotti, Porno Pixie, Prozac, RainBlow Not-So-Bright, Rocky Twat, Smells Like Teen Fanny, Squeeze Box, Two Drinks Away From My Sister, Vagitarian