Trail# 1287 (September 9, 2007)

Trail:1287The Junta hares again (where, oh where, have all the hares gone)
Hares:2Try A Fuck (TAF), The Body
Start:2:01pmWalnut Creek Park
Beer Check:#1The gazebo at 12004 Shady Springs Road
End:3:32pmWalnut Creek Park
Miles:4.0
Temp in Circle:91°F
Pack:23
FRB:Creamadonna
DFL:Wicked Itch of the Yeast
Visitors:2Anal Fission [Odessa H3], Brownie [Pikes Peak H3]
New Boots:0
Six Week Wankers:4Bone Sucker [6wks], Fuck U Knave [10wks], Little Ring Riding Hood [6wks], Twin Peaks [59wks]
Auto Wankers:2Little Ring Riding Hood, Twin Peaks
Awards:0
Namings:0
Transplants:0
Noteworthy Down Downs:0
Maps:Trail Map     Trail Elevation     Check out the Circle Jerk (in red). About half the pack spun around it three times and then went back to the start.

AH3 Statistics (current Junta year)

Trails43
Longest Trail10.0 miles[Jun 24th] Hared by Strap-on Elvis, @ss Gagger
9.6 miles[Jul 15th] Hared by Dead Whore Dave, Dude, Where's My Beercheck?, Twisted Fister
8.5 miles[Apr 22nd] Hared by Wanksgiving, Try A Fuck (TAF), Bubbles The Sad Beer Clown
8.5 miles[Jul 15th] Hared by Dead Whore Dave, Dude, Where's My Beercheck?, Twisted Fister
Shortest Trail0.8 miles[Aug 19th] Hared by El Smeets, Cherry Popper
1.0 miles[Sep 2nd] Hared by Father Syphilis
1.6 miles[Aug 19th] Hared by El Smeets, Cherry Popper
Largest Pack43[Jul 1st] Hared by High Beams, Keeper of the Beams, Wanksgiving
43[Jul 29th] Hared by Bone Sucker, Vagitarian, Open 24 Hours (I Provide The Towel)
42[Jul 22nd] Hared by Bitch, James Bitch!, Hippie Swallow
41[Mar 4th] Hared by Strap-on Elvis, She Mussel Bitch, Day Old Fish, C'em Cummin
Smallest Pack10[Sep 2nd] Hared by Father Syphilis
20[Jan 14th] Hared by Father Syphilis, She Mussel Bitch
20[Apr 15th] Hared by Love Bite, She Mussel Bitch
21[Feb 4th] Hared by babyG, Death By Dildo, Penile Probe
21[Apr 8th] Hared by Pork My Pussy, Cream Of Smeets
Most Auto Wankers16 (37%)[Jul 1st] Hared by High Beams, Keeper of the Beams, Wanksgiving
11 (33%)[Mar 25th] Hared by Death By Dildo, Cornholio, Tuck It Up The Butt
11 (30%)[May 27th] Hared by Day Old Fish, Bubbles The Sad Beer Clown, Wh-Oreo
10 (23%)[Jul 29th] Hared by Bone Sucker, Vagitarian, Open 24 Hours (I Provide The Towel)
Most Frequent FRBFather Syphilis161245,1246,1248,1249,1250,1254,1259,1261,1262,1268,1270,1274,1277,1280,1283,1284
Smut Mutt131251,1252,1253,1258,1260,1263,1265,1266,1273,1275,1278,1279,1285
High Beams31257,1269,1281
Strap-on Elvis31255,1271,1282
Most Frequent DFLWicked Itch of the Yeast81255,1256,1260,1267,1268,1278,1283,1287
Squeezin' Semen31246,1258,1282
Just Head31264,1265,1284
babyG31250,1263,1275
Warmest Circle99°F[Aug 12th] Hared by Wanksgiving, Big Bloody Ketchup
93°F[Aug 26th] Hared by High Beams, Father Syphilis, Try A Fuck (TAF), Day Old Fish, @ss Gagger, Wicked Itch of the Yeast, Brrrr, The Body, Strap-on Elvis
93°F[Aug 19th] Hared by El Smeets, Cherry Popper
92°F[Aug 5th] Hared by Porno Pixie, The Body, Cornholio, Try A Fuck (TAF)
Coldest Circle41°F[Jan 14th] Hared by Father Syphilis, She Mussel Bitch
46°F[Dec 24th] Hared by Free Meat, Vagitarian, Day Old Fish
48°F[Dec 3rd] Hared by Dead Whore Dave, Dude, Where's My Beercheck?, Father Syphilis
Average Trail5 milesThe trails will be in the range 2.9-7.1 miles 68% of the time.
Average Pack30The packs will be in the range 22-38 on 68% of the trails.
Average Attendance16%
Average Trail (2006)5.2 milesThe trails were in the range 3.5-6.3 miles 68% of the time.
Average Pack (2006)37The packs were in the range 27-47 on 68% of the trails.
Average Trail (2005)5.5 milesThe trails were in the range 3.7-7.3 miles 68% of the time.
Average Pack (2005)40The packs were in the range 27-53 on 68% of the trails.
Active Hashers11659% Harriers, 41% Harriettes
Inactive Hashers529
Six-Week Wankers39Average Weeks Wanking= 11
NFHN25
Visitors58
New Boots68And 57 were frightened away by the experience!
Location of Active Austin Hashers
Bubbaland   Central     North       Northwest   East        West        Lake Travis No Zipcode  Not Austin 
100% AttendanceHigh Beams100%
Hashing is my life!Father Syphilis95%
The Body93%
Smut Mutt91%
C'em Cummin88%
Wicked Itch of the Yeast81%
50-75% AttendanceWanksgiving72%
Bubbles The Sad Beer Clown70%
She Mussel Bitch67%
Wh-Oreo67%
Try A Fuck (TAF)67%
Strap-on Elvis65%
Great Dane Pain65%
Day Old Fish63%
Porno Pixie60%
Big Bloody Ketchup58%
Creamadonna56%
Frequent Autowankers (% of Trails)Squeef 83%
El Smeets 75%
Free Meat 67%
Just Crissy (w/PMP) 67%
Cherry Popper 67%
Little Ring Riding Hood 50%
Missed Her Bush 50%
Tuck It Up The Butt 38%
Ball Magnet 33%
Just James (w/PMP) 33%
Just PMP's Mom 33%
Just Carl (w/Do Monkey) 33%
Brrrr 33%
Do Monkey 33%
Most Profilic Hares (# of trails hared)
Day Old Fish81245,1250,1252,1260,1271,1272,1278,1285
Try A Fuck (TAF)61246,1257,1267,1282,1285,1287
The Body61246,1269,1273,1282,1285,1287
High Beams61248,1249,1262,1268,1277,1285
Father Syphilis51247,1253,1257,1285,1286
Bubbles The Sad Beer Clown51245,1251,1254,1267,1272
Strap-on Elvis51248,1252,1260,1276,1285
She Mussel Bitch41253,1258,1260,1266
Wanksgiving41259,1267,1277,1283
Wh-Oreo41245,1251,1254,1272
All Shaft No Head41248,1249,1262,1268
C'em Cummin31260,1271,1278
Vagitarian31250,1270,1281
@ss Gagger31275,1276,1285
Death By Dildo31245,1256,1263
Wicked Itch of the Yeast31261,1274,1285
Experienced Hashers that have NOT hared this Junta year
28A Bill Named Sue, Beaver Cleaver, Cadaver Diver, Creamadonna, Daffadildo, Do Monkey, Fuck U Knave, Head Banger, Heavin' Semen, I Swallow Wood, Itchy Hole, Jug Tugger, Just Head, Meat Between The Teeth, Menage A Paw, Missed Her Bush, Mr. Pib, No Dick Doc, Princess LeiMe, Sphincter Blinker, Squeef, Squeeze Box, Squeezin' Semen, Swalamander, Tornanalsoreass Rex, Twin Peaks, Unzip Me, blASSt Zone
The TOP 10 Hares (# of trails hared) since November 16, 2003
The Body19
Day Old Fish18
Father Syphilis17
She Mussel Bitch17
Try A Fuck (TAF)15
Death By Dildo14
High Beams14
Tuck It Up The Butt12
Brownie11
Strap-on Elvis10
All Shaft No Head10
C'em Cummin10
El Smeets8
Social Retard8
Lost N Mound8
Wanksgiving8
Wicked Itch of the Yeast8
(Massive) Slut Slinger6
Easy Access6
Bubbles The Sad Beer Clown6
Wh-Oreo6
@ss Gagger6
Big Bloody Ketchup6
Squeef6
Love Bite6
A trip down memory lane - Experienced Hashers that haven't been seen on trail for a LONG time
31Bad Andi, Ballsac Fondler, Blocked Orifice, Blow Hole, Diaper Dan, Easy Access, Every Other Dick, Glow Worm, Happy Crack, Have A Nice Bitch, Home Alone, I Pee Freely, Instant Replay, Lewis and Cock, Limestone cOW!boy, Lost N Mound, Medusa, My Ingrown Testicle, Pee Pee Longstocking, Pop-A-Cock, Pork Pushing Pimp, Ram Rod, Rocky Twat, Shaving Private Snatch, Shitonya, Snapping Twat, Speedie Edie, Sperm Bank, Tazmanian Gash, Tits R 4 Tricks, Whoops Wrong Hole
Most enthusiastic New Boots (% attendance since first trail)
Porno Pixie62%
Awards Earned (Active Hashers Only)
666-999 Trails2Crusty Beaver, She Mussel Bitch
250-499 Trails12Big Bloody Ketchup, Cherry Popper, Father Syphilis, Meat Between The Teeth, Mr. Pib, Organ Grinder, Pumper Up The Butt, SmegmaBalls, Smut Mutt, The Body, Try A Fuck (TAF), Twin Peaks
100-249 Trails22A Bill Named Sue, All Shaft No Head, Bubbles The Sad Beer Clown, Cadaver Diver, Creamadonna, Crotch Rot, Day Old Fish, El Smeets, Free Meat, High Beams, Itchy Hole, Jug Tugger, Just Head, Love Bite, Squeef, Squeezin' Semen, Stay Free With Wings, Strap-on Elvis, Swalamander, Unzip Me, Wanksgiving, Wicked Itch of the Yeast
69-99 Trails6C'em Cummin, Death By Dildo, Fuck U Knave, Great Dane Pain, Tuck It Up The Butt, Wh-Oreo
25-68 Trails24@ss Gagger, babyG, Beaver Cleaver, Bitch, James Bitch!, blASSt Zone, Bone Sucker, Brrrr, Cornholio, Daffadildo, Dead Whore Dave, Do Monkey, Head Banger, Heavin' Semen, Hippie Swallow, I Swallow Wood, Menage A Paw, Missed Her Bush, No Dick Doc, Porno Pixie, Princess LeiMe, Sphincter Blinker, Squeeze Box, Tornanalsoreass Rex, Vagitarian